Are Your ‘False Expectations Appearing Real’ Holding You Back?


Are Your ‘False Expectations Appearing Real’ Holding You Back?

What is fear, really?

From my coaching experience, fear can be explained as the ‘false expectations appearing real’! So, what are these false expectations that are appearing real, when I do a Facebook Live event or should I say, that stop me from doing a Facebook Live event?

Great question! I have recorded and uploaded over 400 videos to YouTube and never felt the intense ‘fear’ that I did the moment I went to stream live to my personal profile. I recall that moment well, I was so excited about the ability to live stream to Facebook, I never once expected to go into this space of fear and overwhelm, but I did! I was about to push the live button, and I froze, all these unexpected thoughts started to flow into my brain, my ego was taking over.

I was thinking, “What will my friends think? What do I know about this subject? What if I stuff this up? What if the lighting isn’t perfect?” And on and on I went with this self-talk. However, I pushed through this moment, still shaking, I took control and went live. Wow, what a feeling! It was awesome, and after I worked through the fear, I was happy that I could share my knowledge and experiences with my friends.

How do we overcome this fear?

Well, it is all about the self-talk and the ego. The ego is there to protect us, not to assist us in being uncomfortable. The moment we take any action to be uncomfortable or work outside of our existing comfort zone, the ego takes over with the flight and fight autopilot to protect us from getting hurt. I bet you are thinking, the mobile device is not going to cause me any pain, and you are right.

What is coming up for us as fear can be a number of things:

  • Fear of being judged.
  • Fear of success.
  • Fear of failure.

However, none of these is real; they are moments in the future that may or may not occur. At this moment right now, when you are about to push the live button, we have no idea what will happen in the future.

You can be prepared for your success creating and delivering a live video, by practising, by being confident that you know the material that you are going to talk about, by having a script and a strategy around your live event. But you can’t predict the three major fears that may or may not occur.

My suggestion is to practice and become comfortable, be prepared before you go live, and face those fears as they come up for you, note that they are not real, not life threatening and acknowledge your inner awesomeness as a business owner. You have all the knowledge and experience of your said subject, take that on board and deliver outstanding advice and education.

Will you face others opinions and comments?

Of course, you will. I have people private message me to tell me my lighting was bad or I need to change this or that, and I now laugh. I look at their profiles and see that fear is still holding them back; they haven’t published any content online live. I believe that people in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones, and unless you are doing them yourself, you have very little right to give feedback.

There are factors that we cannot control, like the speed of the internet, I have trouble all the time, however that is not going to stop me from sharing my content. Some might say that’s not professional and I would possibly agree, however, the moment to shine on Facebook Live is now, and I am not about to give up this moment and wait for all the ducks to be in a line to satisfy someone that I don’t even know.

  1. Be prepared.
  2. Ensure you have good lighting.
  3. Make sure your audio is clear.
  4. Know your subject matter.
  5. Go live and face the fear.

Facebook Live videos get seven times more engagement than pre-recorded videos. On the Facebook Live map, at any given time, there are only a small number of people in Australia utilising this amazing platform. I question, where are all the business owners? Why aren’t they sharing their knowledge and educating their potential clients on a social media platform that is working towards being as big as YouTube?

I hope that this article inspires you to be an action taker and to kick the fear to the curb. You are awesome, and you have more knowledge then your potential client base.

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