A lesson I learnt fairly early in business was not to hire someone to help…
Ever Wondered Why You Don’t Achieve Your Goals? (Part 1)
Ever wondered why you sometimes have those goals that you don’t quite achieve? You may almost get there, or you may not even get close to achieving them. Or maybe you decide it’s not important, and it ends up on the scrap heap.
Our values are our internal compass, and they direct our lives.
They are at the core of decisions that we make, and they influence what we are prepared to do or not prepared to do. They are often responsible for that feeling we get in the gut when we make a decision that doesn’t feel quite right, and when we do things that are in alignment with our values we feel satisfied and fulfilled.
Values are often at the cause of our issues with other people and greatly affect how happy we are in our relationships. Many relationship breakups are the result of values not being met by one or both parties. And we are all aware of those amazing relationships, the couples that have been together for decades, they hold hands and are still so obviously deeply in love even in old age. Their relationships are fulfilling, they just seem to flow, and you can bet your bottom dollar that their values are similar and in alignment.
I remember a relationship I had a few years ago with a man I was deeply in love with. As time went on I began to feel more and more unfulfilled. I found myself over compromising to make the relationship work; my needs were not being met, and no matter how many discussions we had, that didn’t change. Eventually, I walked away because it became the only way for me to fulfil my values.
So it stands to reason if values are that powerful and drive us internally, it’s important that our personal values are aligned with our goals. You need to build a relationship with your goals, so you are really into them.
If your goals aren’t in alignment with your values, you may find yourself resisting implementing the strategies to achieve them and some people even feel a physical block.
When we get clear on our personal values and ensure that our goals are aligned with them, we become a powerhouse in goal achievement. We achieve with more ease and flow, and when we achieve the goal, we feel incredibly fulfilled, just like those beautiful couples that have been together for decades.
1. Get clear on your outcome
When you set your goal, get really clear on what you want to achieve. Make your goal sensory specific, what I mean by that is what it will look like, what you will hear, what you will say to yourself and how you will feel when you achieve it. Make it measurable and make sure that your deadline is realistic. When you do this, you bring your goal to life and give yourself a lot more clarity.
2. Get clear on your own personal core values
Your values are the things that are really important to you; they are operating on an unconscious level. Your values are present in the moments when you are feeling completely fulfilled. For example, they are words like integrity, honesty, connection and success. When you know your values, it will assist you to feel fulfilled in all aspects of your life.
3. Align your values with your goals
Ask yourself honestly which values you will be fulfilling by achieving the goal you have set and which values this goal could be in conflict with. If there are any values in conflict, its time to adjust the goal or adjust your values to ensure that they are all in alignment. When you do this, your goals will feel more congruent.
Our values are always operating on an unconscious level, and because they are unconscious, you need to allow yourself time and space to explore them. A coach can assist you with this process and help you get a really clear understanding of what your values are and how they work. When you get really clear on this important influencer, it can lead to more fulfilling relationships, a satisfying career and business and gives you maximum opportunity to achieve your goals.
“The opinions expressed by Smallville Contributors are their own, not those of www.smallville.com.au"
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